These last couple weeks have been a bit trying, but this past week was probably the worst.  My husband’s father passed away after struggling with Parkinson’s Disease for many years.  As can often be the case, his death was both a relief and the surprising emotions that come with finality after watching him decline for so many years.

In part, I’m bringing this up because it delayed this week’s post.  And in part, I’m mentioning it because things happen that are unplanned, regardless of how strong you feel you might be in your weight loss journey.

I found myself in a real mental war.  Normally, in my carb and calorie cycling, my low days are on weekdays, and higher days on weekends.  But that’s really only when my food choices are totally in my control.  They really weren’t for several days this past week; while I normally don’t have any problems with turning away from potluck foods, it would have been awkward and rude to do so when people were supplying food as a condolence offering to the family.  There are times when you just have to shut up and deal with it, and not make a fuss over it.

Yet at the same time, I was mentally flogging myself for not eating well, for not exercising, for not staying true to the course I’ve set for myself, feeling as if I was backsliding somehow.  With all due respect… WTF? Why on earth do I do this to myself?  Really, truly, the worst thing I had in days was a smallish piece of cake.  My carbs were above my goal range for several days, but my calories were within acceptable range. And here I was, berating myself for not choosing better foods, even though they weren’t available.

Honestly, if I’m investing in a lifetime plan, there will be times when I chose to alter my eating and exercise plans.  While this one was unplanned, it’s not the end of the world, and there’s no harm done.  The world didn’t end.  I didn’t gain 20 pounds from having a couple amaretto sours the night before a funeral.  (There, I probably could have made better choices.)  I have to learn to cut myself the occasional break, or I’ll get back into that punishment mindset that makes me sabotage myself.

So, if you’re standing at the plate and the pitcher throws you a curveball, you can watch it go by and strike out looking, or you can do the best you can.  Any ball player will tell you that striking out swinging is better than to be caught looking; and for you non-baseball people, this is a metaphor for saying that you can either let crap bog you down, or you can try to make the best of it.  😉

Even though I just posted this today, I’ll keep up with my goal pants tomorrow, and hope for the best.