Walk On

“I can control what I put in my mouth, even if I can’t control much else that’s going on right now.”

This is the answer I gave when a cookbook author I follow on social media asked for good reasons to not go off the rails with food. This statement has been true since the very beginning of my journey, and even though these are rough times, I’ve had challenges and tests before in my life, and having something within my total control has been important during those times.

That’s really what set me on course in the beginning years ago; I felt my life was entirely outside my control, and I needed one simple thing I could do for me. Knowing that I could take control of how I feed my body, even if it didn’t result in weight loss, gave me something to anchor to. Since then, it’s expanded to include all the things that have helped me move forward.

It would be just as easy for me to stuff my face with whatever might be handy; it’s not like there aren’t such foods in my home. I know I’ve got the ingredients to make any number of things that might soothe an instant need, but in the long run, will make me gain weight and feel crappy about it. That’s the last thing I need, and I don’t really feel the pull to go off my plan at the moment. That’s not really why I’m talking about it, anyway.

Find your anchor and hold tight.

It’s the control that matters, now. When everything else is unpredictable and changing by the hour, I know there are small things I still control: me. How I choose to feed my body. How I choose to spend my days, embracing routine instead of chaos. Knowing that this, too, shall pass.

We’ve been taking walks when we can; it has helped to get outside, in nature, and away from the constant stream of news. I’ve met my step goals and for the most part, I’ve stayed in control of what I eat. While I think it’s smart to know what’s going on and to react accordingly, I also control the amount of information I subject myself to, and I’ve learned to recognize when I’m getting overwhelmed and I step away. Taking walks and looking for the good in the world has helped keep me focused.

I have been keeping the things that feed my soul, as well; although I’m very involved in orchestra, we have opted to discontinue the rest of this season, my top reason to play is for myself. I’m taking some of this time to work on my skills. I’ve been reading a lot, as well.

I’ve been maintaining and doing the things I know are within my control while I deal with the same things all of us are: uncertainty, drastic change in how we live, a ton of canceled plans. While canceling our spring break plans bothered me greatly, it was partly because I had created goals around the trip; we can always reschedule when the world settles down a bit, but it’s the loss of goals that left me feeling shocked. I still am thinking about ways to realign my goals; things I can be doing to move forward and finally get to the pinnacle this entire journey has been moving me toward.

Control of my own life is my anchor against the inevitable storms of life, and the stronger and more control I am, the less likely the tough storms will do damage. The storm will pass; I will walk on.

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