So here I am, at Week 35!

It occurred to me during my workout, today, that this is the second longest effort I’ve ever made toward weight loss, and probably also the second highest amount of weight, too.

It was 8 months yesterday since starting, again.  Even if I still consider my weight loss to be at 44 pounds (don’t know if there’s more or not, since it’s been a few weeks), I think the most recent big weight loss I had was a few years ago, when I did an online “Biggest Loser” sort of competition with online friends; that lasted 6 months, and I think I lost about the same amount of weight.

Before that, it was The Big Effort.  140.5 pounds, and several years in the process before my weight really started increasing in a bad way. That started in June, 2003.

At this point in my efforts, I feel a lot better about them now than I did, then.  I’m in a much better mental place than I was when I was trying back then; at 44 pounds down, I still wasn’t sure what I could accomplish, since I was also in the worst physical shape of my life.  Even at 317 pounds and several years older, this time, I started off with a better physical ability and mental attitude.

Back then, I wasn’t sure what I could accomplish, and while I was pretty high on life by the time I’d dropped 80 or so pounds, I was still pretty unsure around that 40 pound mark.  I had no idea what my body was capable of.  I worried that I’d hurt myself, and with good cause.

Now, I have a pretty good idea what I’m capable of doing, and how to get there.  Before, I was just taking one step forward as I could; these days, I know what path I want to follow.  I know what my body can do.  I know how it responds.  Frankly, I’m in a lot better physical shape at 290 and 50 years old than I was at 290 and 42 years old; back then, I was walking around my yard and adding a couple minutes to my total time when I could.  This morning, I did a solid hour of water jogging to dance music in the pool.

I have gone too far, now, to even consider going backward.  Although I know I will occasionally flounder and doubt, I think that’s okay, as long as I remind myself that the solution to doubt isn’t to gain the weight back; that is never, ever a solution to anything.