Week 17: A Look Back

Allow me to be a bit proud — and smug: I know it’s the time of year when many people are kicking themselves over holiday indiscretions and inevitable weight gain. That, for once, isn’t me.

Nope. Not this year. I’m thankful for that simple fact. Believe me, if you are considering the traditional January kick-off to losing weight and/or improving your health, there is no better gift you can give yourself than to take that first positive step. That, alone, is a game-changer. You can look in the mirror and while you might not be happy with today’s reflection, you know you’re doing something to create change. The mental flogging and guilt can stop.

Taking that initial step is huge. The steps that follow it bring even greater rewards. While my weight loss is admittedly slow, it’s not weight gain, and believe me, as easily as I gain weight, that alone is a bonus. I’m still going through some medical adjustments that influence my ability to lose weight, but my head is in the right place, and I feel pretty good about where I’m at right now.

I could recount a hundred small things that have changed in the last 17 weeks, but the end result is the one that counts: life is just easier than it was four short months ago. I move easier, I feel better, I am healthier.

The second day of my diet, I made a video to myself. A month later, I did a follow-up. I’ve never done this, before; I’ve taken progress photos, but I’ve never looked back at the person I was at a certain point in my progress. I just watched both videos; the first was an honest plea to my “future self” to keep up the good fight, no matter what. I knew at some point I would be challenged, I’d want to minimize the progress I’ve made and take the easy way. It was a smart thing to do. I’m not the same person I was four months ago, but I need to remember the pain and fears of that person.

The second was progress a month in, and the changes in me were already becoming evident. That video spoke about not giving up when times are tough, and to not listen to the voices that tell me I am not good enough. Both of these were excellent points to remember, because I’m guilty of playing head games with myself and convincing myself that my efforts aren’t worth it.

It’s one thing to be told by someone that you’re not worth it, and to give up. It’s far more dangerous to allow that someone to be you. And I often do that. The person who keeps me from my successes is no longer my father or some other person in my life; it’s me. And that’s a tough pill to swallow. It’s so much easier to blame someone else.

The message of both videos, in which I speak to the person who needs the encouragement at some future point, facing some perhaps predictable challenge, is this: It’s not who I am, today. It’s who I am, tomorrow that matters.

As long as I work toward change and progress, I will always be better tomorrow. Sometimes, the victories will be monumental; and sometimes, they’ll be infinitesimal. It’s the sum of those efforts that matter; that produce a healthier body, a healthier mind, and this should remain my goal every day.

This is what I’m looking forward to in 2014; and at the end of next year, I hope to be able to look back and add to the successes. Thanks for being along on the journey.

 

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